Diferent story

1: CLOSE THE DOOR

An employer advertised for an opening in his firm and received many applications. Based on these, he selected two men and asked them to come for an interview. The employer then observed each man carefully during the interview. When the first man entered the room, he left the door open behind him. The employer spoke with him for about 15 minutes, and then asked him to wait outside. When the second applicant entered, he shut the door behind him. After speaking with him, the employer asked him to also wait outside, and then called his secretary. "That first man I spoke to, " he said, "has all the qualifications, but I have decided to give the job to the second man." Why is that?" "Because the first man left the door open. It appears he is a lazy fellow. The other man shut the door, so while he may not be

so qualified, he will learn quickly."

MORAL: Even though one may be so-called qualified, if he is not trained in simple etiquettes like closing doors, what is the use of his learning?

2: THE EXPERT PLASTERER

There is a story about an the expert craftsmanship of a plasterer who worked on the construction of the Taj Mahal. One of the top directors of the construction was inspecting the building in progress and noticed for three days in a row a certain plasterer who was sitting in the same place mixing plaster. On the third day the inspector became angry and said, "Why are you still simply sitting and mixing this plaster? You are so lazy!" The man who was mixing the plaster also became very angry, and he threw a handful of his plaster at the inspector. The plaster missed the inspector but landed on a wall. The plaster was so well mixed, however, so solid and hard, that no one could get it off the wall, and it is still there today.

MORAL: We must do everything nicely in Krsna's service

3: INCREASING THE FEVER

There was once a doctor visiting a house to diagnose two patients, a rich housewife and her maidservant. The doctor said, "The maidservant's fever is 105, so there is some anxiety. I will give her some medicine. But the landlady of the house has practically no fever, 99, so there is no anxiety for her." But when the landlady heard this, she became angry and said, "this doctor is useless. I'm the landlady. I've only got 99 and my maidservant has 105. The maidservant should have 98, I should have 110!" MORAL: The modern civilization is inclined to increase the degree of it's fever up to 110. As in the human body there is death as soon as the temperature reaches 107, so by the nuclear weapons, modern civilization will come to the point of 107 and over. But devotees want to decrease the fever by living the highest, ideal life and decreasing the demands of the body.

4: THE MISSIONARY AND THE COAL MINERS

Once there was a Christian minister preaching among coal miners. The missionary began a fire and brimstone speech by telling the miners that a sinful person would have to go hell and could only be saved if he surrendered to Jesus Christ. On hearing the name of Jesus Christ, one of the miners asked, "What is his number?" Since everyone in the mining company was assigned a number, the miners could not imagine Jesus Christ being anyone other than a mine worker. The missionary tried again by describing the misery of hell. "Hell," he said, "is very dark and damp." The miners looked back at the missionary without concern. His description of hell sounded just like the mine which they already knew. Then the missionary understood that he was preaching to people with a very limited conception of reality, and so he would have to address their actual experience. "And in hell," he said, "There are no newspapers!" "Oh horrible! Very frightening!" The miners exclaimed.

MORAL: We have to preach according to kala-desha-patra; time, place and circumstance.

5: THE LAZY MEN

Only a lazy man cannot cook. There was a king who announced that all lazy men in his kingdom could come to the charity house and be fed. Hundreds of people came, and they all said, "I am a lazy man." The king then told his minister to set fire to the charity house. Suddenly all these lazy people became very active. Everyone inside except two men immediately ran out of the burning building. Of the two remaining, one man said to the other, "My back is becoming very hot from the fire." The other man advised, "Just turn over to the other side." Seeing these two, the king said, "These are actually lazy men. Feed them."

6: SCISSOR PHILOSOPHY

Two men were arguing about which cutting instruments should be used, a knife or scissors. "Knife!" said one. "No, scissors!" said the other. Their talk became a heated fight. "If you don't agree," said the man who advocated the knife, "I will throw you in the river." "No, I'll never change my mind. It's scissors!" So the knife advocate threw the other into the swift river. He swam for a while but became exhausted and began to sink. But he was so stubborn about holding his point of view, that even after sinking under the water to his death, he held up his arm and crossed his fingers back and forth like a pair of scissors cutting.

MORAL: Stubbor people such as scientists or impersonalists will never accept defeat. Even though completely smashed, they still maintain that they are right.

7: BHAGAVAT'S TEN FRIENDS PLAY A TRICK

This story is called Dasa cakre bhagavat butha, "How Bhagavat's ten friends tricked him to think he was a ghost."
Bhagavat's friends wanted to play a trick on him, so about ten of them conspired. Then when Bhagavat went to visit one of his friends, the man gasped and cried, "Oh, you have become a ghost!" Bhagavat, in amused disbelief, replied, "No, I haven't become a ghost. What is the matter with you?" But the friend repeated in a horrified voice, "You've become a ghost!" Bhagavat didn't take it seriously, but when he saw his next friend, the man acted in the same frightened way. After this happened ten times, Bhagavat himself became horrified: "Yes, I've become a ghost!"

MORAL: Sometimes by maya and also the influence of the mind, we believe that we are worse off than we actually are. This is the definition of propoganda. If it's not a ghost, by propoganda you can make people believe it's a ghost.

8: THE TASTE OF JACKFRUIT

A man in a foreign land tried to describe to his friend about a jackfruit. But he confessed that there was no way to describe it unless you tasted it. When the friend insisted on some verbal description, that if you were to drink sugar-cane juice through a Muslim's beard, then you might understand the taste of a jackfruit. MORAL: This is like the attempt of so-called philosophers to understand Krsna's pastimes, such as the rasa-lila.

9: THE YOGI'S WAGER

A servant of a very rich man came before his master one day and told him of an interesting yogi he had seen in the river. The servant said that this yogi claimed he could stay in the water all night in the middle of the river without any outside heat. The yogi was willing t take a wager with anyone to prove that he could do it. When the rich man heard this, he decided to wager against the yogi. So the bet was made to see whether the yogi could stay in the water all night. The yogi went into the water, and the rich man and his servant went home. The next day word came that the yogi had successfully stayed in the water all night. The rich man went out to see the yogi, and indeed he was still standing in the water. Therefore by all rights the rich man had lost the wager. But then a friend of the rich man said, "Wait! See that light?" He pointed to a small flame far away in a temple. The rich man's friend said, "By his mystic power, this yogi has been using the heat of that light to keep warm in the water. So he shouldn't be paid, because the bet was that he would stay in the water without taking any heat." Taking advantage of this word jugglery, the rich man said, "Yes I'm not going to pay you. You've tricked me." Then the rich man and his servant went back to the house. The rich man asked his servant to quickly cook him a nice breakfast, but after waiting for some time, the servant had not produced anything. The rich man expressed his impatience, but the servant replied, "Please wait. I'm cooking." The rich man waited, but it got later and later and no food was brought. When he demanded food from his servant, the servant only replied, "I'm cooking. It's going to be ready soon." Finally the rich man became angry and walked into the kitchen. "What is this cooking?" he demanded. And there he saw that the servant had a very strange arrangement for cooking. He had a very small fire on the ground an a tall bamboo tripod to hold the pot he was supposed to be heating high near the ceiling. Obviously, the small flame would never be able to reach the pot to heat it. "What do you think you're doing?" demanded the rich man. "Well," said the servant, if you claim that the yogi was keeping warm in

the water by that light, then I am also cooking." The man could understand that his servant was dissatisfied with the outcome of the wager with the yogi. And so he went and paid the yogi the wager.

MORAL: If you want to get a result, you have to follow the process. What is the use of trying to chant God's name but at the same time doint all nonsense.

10: SARGAL SINGH

To illustrate the foolishness of becoming a blind follower, there is a story about the death of Sargal Singh. Sargal

Singh was very much loved by a merchant, and so when Sargal Singh died, the merchant shaved his head and wore dark clothes. When another man came into the merchant's shop, he asked who had died. "Sargal Singh has died," said the merchant. The visitor did not want to seem ignorant and so did not ask who Sargal Singh was, but he also shaved his head and wore dark clothes. Other people in town began to follow, not wanting to appear ignorant. When anyone asked who had died, they replied, "Sargal Singh has died." When a minister of the king saw so many citizens in mourning he also wore dark clothes and shaved his head. But when the king saw this, he inquired, "Why are you mourning, and for whom?" "Sargal Singh," the minister replied. The king asked, "Who is that?" When the minister couldn't answer the king told him to find out. The minister then inquired and inquired and finally reached the merchant. "Who is Sargal Singh?" The merchant replied, "Sargal Singh was my donkey, whom I loved very much."

MORAL: Blind following is condemned here.

11: THE OLD LADY'S BLESSING

During the time of the British Raja, there was an old lady who lived in a remote village, and one day the British district magistrate visited her town. This old lady had been entangled in a quarrel regarding possession of land, which some of her relatives had been trying to take from her. Friends advised that she see the magistrate and present the matter to him for settlement. When she did so, the magistrate immediately ruled in her favour and made sure the land was put in her name. Delighted, the old lady attempted to bless the magistrate. "I bless you," she said, "that in your next life you will become a policeman."

MORAL: The highest post that this woman was aware of was a policeman, so that was her blessing. She did not know that the district magistrate was a higher post. Similarly, caste brahmanas consider their caste to be superior to that of the Vaisnava community, but this is due to a poor fund of knowledge.

12: THE WORTHLESS WORSHIPPER OF KALI

An insensitive worshipper of the goddess Kali went to the temple and prayed to the goddess in a materialistic way, typical of a demigod worshipper. He asked for a material benediction. After his prayers and a perfunctory puja, he soon got the desired result. But his puja included an obligation that when he got the desired result he would offer the goddess a sacrifice of a goat. After some days passed, the goddess in the temple spoke to the worshipper and asked him, "Where is the goat you promised?" "It is very expensive," he said, "and I don't think I can afford to feed you a goat." "All right," said the goddess, " but you have to offer something. So go and offer me at least a pig." The worshipper went away but neglected the goddess's request. Then on another occasion in the temple the goddess spoke to him again and said, "Where is the offering of a pig?" This time the devotee again excused himself and said, "I am sorry, but I could not find any pigs anywhere. It is not so easy." The goddess replied, "This is not very good. You have received your benediction, and now you must give something in return. But just to make it easy for you, I request that you at least offer something that is available for you. So why don't you at least offer me a fly? "But goddess," said the worthless worshipper, "there are so many flies buzzing around you. Can't you just grab one yourself?"

MORAL: Demigod worship does not involve any love whatsoever. This type of worship is very selfish, and one only has his own interests at heart.

13: SMOKING GANJA THROUGH FRIEND'S HAND

If one has got their own philosophy, then let them preach their own philosophy. But do not do it in the name the of the Gita. This is our protest to all the interpreters of the Bhagavad-gita. If they do not believe in God, Krsna, and they don't want to surrender to Him, then let them preach atheism. Everyone has got the right to do this, but why through the Gita? This is like the man who wants to smoke ganja, but he does not want to be caught. So he takes a friend's hand and smokes it in his hand, and then when the authorities come, he says, "Oh I have not smoked ganja. See, my hands are clean!" MORAL: The idea is that if one wants to preach the Gita, then he must preach it as it is, otherwise don't go through the Gita.

14: THE HIMALAYAS GIVE BIRTH

When the word spread that the world famous, huge Himalayan mountain range was going to produce offspring, hundreds of people began gathering at the foothills of the mountains. In anticipation, crowds waited, and finally they saw hundreds of rats running from the mountains.

MORAL: It is expected that from the great universities of the world, something wonderful will come out. But unless they become Krsna conscious, they would be like the offspring of the Himalayan mountains.

15: THE THIEF WHO WENT TO VRNDAVANA

One professional reciter was reciting about Bhagavata, describing that Krsna, being highly decorated with all jewels, is sent for tending the cows in the forest. There was a thief at that meeting, and when he heard about Krsna, he thought, "Why not go to Vrndavan and plan to catch this boy in the forest with so many valuable jewels? I can go there and catch the child and take all the jewels." That was the thief's intention. He was serious, thinking, "I must find out that boy. Then in one night I will become a millionaire." And he went to Vrndavan. His qualification was, "I must see Krsna. I must see Krsna." That anxiety, that eagerness made it possible for him to see Krsna in Vrndavan. He saw Krsna in the same way he was informed by the Bhagavata reader. Then he thought, "Oh you are such a nice boy, Krsna." He began to flatter. He thought that by flattering he would obtain the jewels. But then he proposed his real business to Krsna. "May I take some of your ornaments? You are so rich." "No no," said Krsna. And then by Krsna's association he had already become purified. At last Krsna said, "All right, you can take." But then the man became a devotee.

MORAL: Because by association, somehow or other, we should come in contact with Krsna., and then we will become purified.

16: I KNOW KRSNA

There are so many Indians who are quick to say, "I know Krsna, I know Krsna." There is a story in this regard. There was once a man who every day brought water to the temple of Lord Jagannatha. The man used to think, "I don't need to see Lord Jagannatha. I come here every day and so I can see Him any time I want. Let the others see Him." Day after day went by and the man never went to see Lord Jagannatha. Finally the man died without once seeing the Lord. MORAL: We have to take advantage of our fortunate situation, and take to Krsna consciousness thus perfecting our lives.

17: THE JUDGE'S TIFFIN BREAK

We have become first-class imitators. There is a story in this regard. It was 1914. World War one was in progress, and the high court judges were on their tiffin hour. "Mr Mukerjee," a high court judge said to Ashutosh Mukerjee, "now the Germans are coming. What are you going to do?" "We shall offer our respects to them and invite them to do as they will," replied Mr Mukerjee. This answer startled the Englishman. "Why do I say that? You have simply taught us to be servants. Our business is to receive. You have trained us as servants."

18: THE CAT IN THE BASKET

When it was time for her daughter's marriage, one woman made many elaborate arrangements for a smooth wedding ceremony. However, in the middle of the proceedings a cat ran out into the middle of the assembly.

"Oh no!" thought the mother. "What to do?" She spied a basket and promptly grabbed it, trapping the cat underneath. Relieved, they carried on the marriage ceremony undisturbed.

Some years later, when the bride was grown up and had her own family, it was time for her daughter's marriage ceremony. All elaborate arrangements were made, but the mother still felt something amiss. Then she remembered, "Ah, I remember that at my wedding my mother had a cat in a basket placed there." So she fetched a cat, put a basket on it and carried on the proceedings. And it became a tradition in that family.

MORAL: Due to a poor fund of knowledge, people accept certain theories as truth, but never stop to question why those theories exist. This story criticises the tendency to follow blindly.

19: THE DEVOTEE WHO KEPT HIS TILAKA

There was once a factory where all the workers were Hindus, and mostly Vaisnavas. The Vaisnavas had freedom, therefore, to wear their Vaisnava tilaka to work, and they also displayed other Vaisnava paraphernalia. But after some time, the factory went to new management, and then the proprietor was a Muslim. On taking over the business, the Muslim owner declared that he would not allow the workers to come to work any more wearing Vaisnava tilaka. Most of the workers obeyed, and on the given date announced by the owner, they appeared at the factory without their tilaka. One employee, however, thought that he would take his chances and depend on Krsna. So he went to work wearing very clear, white Vaisnava tilaka. After seeing all the workers assembled, the new Muslim proprietor said, "This one devotee who has worn Vaisnava tilaka is very courageous. He may be permitted to continue wearing the tilaka to work. But all others are forbidden to wear it any more." MORAL: We should not unnecessarily abandon our Vaisnava culture.

20: THE DANCER WHO COULDN'T PERFORM

There was a professional dancer who used to hold performances in many different places, including outdoor sites. After one scheduled performance, a friend asked the dancer, "So did you perform last night?" "No," said the dancer. "I could not." His friend was surprised and asked why not, and the dancer replied, "There was a hill." In other words, due to the nonideal situation, the dancer did not perform. But this is not a real dancer.

MORAL: A real dancer would have danced even if the hill was offered as the site for dancing. And even if the dancing performance was not up to standard, a real dancer would have danced under any circumstances. Similarly, a dedicated disciple will perform his or her duty even if facilities are lacking.

21: THE RAT WHO GOT LIBERATION

There was once a rat who became liberated by offering service to Lord Vine. The rat was running on the altar of the Deity, just at a time when one of the ghee lamps was about to go out. The rat thought that the flame might be some foodstuffs, so he stuck his whiskers in it. The dying flame caught on to the rat's whiskers, and the fire flared up, catching on to the unused portion of the wick. In this way, by the rat's foolish sacrifice, the flame on Visnu's altar continued to burn nicely. And for his service to Krsna, the rat went to Vaikuntha. MORAL: This is the potency of devotional service to Krsna, even if performed unknowingly.

22: THE LAMB AND THE TIGER

A lamb was once drinking water from the side of a lake. Across the water was a tiger. The tiger challenged the lamb, "Why are you muddying the lake?" The lamb replied that he was not muddying the lake, but the tiger quarrelled with the lamb and then killed it.

MORAL: This story illustrates how people in animal consciousness look for faults in others and then create quarrels in order to kill. "Give a dog a bad name and hang it."

23: JASOVANTA SINGH RETURNS HOME

Jasovanta Singh was commanding general under General Aurangzeb. In a battle, Jasovanta Singh met defeat, and so he returned home to his palace. But the palace gate was closed. He sent a message to his queen informing him that he had returned home and asking why she had closed the gate.. Upon hearing this message, the queen replied, "Who has returned home? Jasovanta Singh? No no, it cannot be. Jasovanta Singh would never return home after being defeated. He would either conquer or give up his life. The person at the door must be a pretender." So saying, she refused to open the door. MORAL: This story illustrates the ksatriya spirit.

24: THE DRUNKARD

There was a story that one man was drinking. In India drinking is considered a great sin, so his friend advised him, "Because you are drinking, you will go to hell!" He replied, "Oh, my father also drinks." So his friend said, "Then your father will also go to hell!" And he replied, "Oh, my brother also drinks." - "Then he will also go to hell!" In this way he continued to say my father, my brother, my sister, my this, my that. And his friend was replying, "Yes, they will also go to hell!" Then the man said, "Oh, then this hell is like heaven! Because if we are all drinking here, and we can all drink there, what is the hell? - That is heaven!"

MORAL: This is the mentality of the atheist who has no idea of the kingdom of God. His idea of pleasure is simply a relief from suffering.

25: THE NAWAB'S CHANDELIER

Nawab means 'rich one'. He has so much money he doesn't know what to do with it. One nawab had his servant cleaning a big, big crystal chandelier. So, as the servant was cleaning the crystal chandelier, a crystal fell, and as it crashed onto the marble floor it made an unusual tinkling sound, which the nawab heard from his room. The nawab came running out and asked, "What was that sound?" The servant was petrified and asked forgiveness. "I'm sorry," he said. "When I was cleaning the chandelier, one of the precious crystals fell and shattered on the floor. I am very sorry." The nawab said, "Oh, this is a very nice sound. Throw one more down." So the servant smashed another onto the floor. "Very nice sound," said the nawab. "Throw another one down." And so in this way, every single crystal of the chandelier was thrown and smashed on the ground. Because the nawab had so much money at his disposal, he could do anything he liked.

26: WEIGHING THE ELEPHANT

Some labourers were criticizing the minister of the king, claiming that he only sat around and did no work. The king reminded them that it took intelligence to become a minister. He said he would give a test for everyone, including the minister. Whoever could pass the test could become the next minister. The king said, "Take this big elephant, weigh him and let me know the exact weight." The ordinary men were baffled. Where was there a scale for weighing an elephant? They could not do anything. They came back to the king with no information. Then the king turned to his minister and asked, "Will you kindly weigh this elephant?" So in six minutes he came back and reported, "It is twenty mounds [1,920]." The other men were standing open-mouthed in surprise. "How is that?" they asked. "Within six minutes he came back and he gave the exact weight!" The king asked, "How did you weigh him? Did you get some very big scale?" "No sir," replied the minister. "It is not possible too weigh the elephant on a scale. It is very difficult." "Then how did you weigh it?" "I took it on a boat. When I got him on the boat then I saw the watermark and I marked it. Then, after getting the elephant off the boat, I added weight onto the boat, and when it came to the same watermark, then I understood." SO the king addressed the labourers and cautioned them, "Now you see the difference?" They agreed, "Yes."

MORAL: Buddhir yasya balang tasya nirbuddhes tu kuto balang / pashya singha madonmatah shashah kena nipatata. A shasha, a rabbit killed a singha, a big lion by intelligence. One who has got intelligence, he has strength, and one who has no intelligence has no strength. Foolish people often criticize devotees as do-nothings and weaklings, but such people do not understand the intelligence of a devotee. Therefore, a devotee does not have to heed such people.

27: IF THERE IS MONEY, THERE IS INTELLIGENCE

One man asked another, "Are you intelligent?" The second man started to look in his pockets. The first man asked, "Why are you looking in your pockets?" The second man said, "Well, if there is any money there, that means I'm intelligent." MORAL: We may be preaching, but if there is no money, then where is the intelligence.

28: THE RASCAL VETERINARIAN

To illustrate the foolishness of the imitative followers of Sankara, there is a story about a doctor and his apprentice. There was a famous veterinarian who travelled to many farms and had good success in curing the illnesses of animals. The veterinarian also had an assistant who accompanied him, but this assistant had an envious and ambitious desire to replace his master and to prematurely become a master veterinarian himself. On one occasion the veterinarian was called to a farm where he discovered a valuable horse whose neck was greatly swollen. The veterinarian opened the mouth of the horse, examined inside, and then asked the apprentice to hand him his work bag. Taking out his hammer, the veterinarian proceeded to smash at the horse's neck. Very soon after this unusual action, the horse's swelling subsided, and the farmer thankfully praised and paid the veterinarian for his work. Almost immediately after this incident, the apprentice deserted the doctor and decided to become a veterinarian himself. Word soon reached the master veterinarian that his apprentice was running around presenting himself as a genuine veterinarian but was causing havoc wherever he went. The report was that the so-called veterinarian was actually killing animals whenever he attempted to treat them. Finally, the master veterinarian caught up with his rascal apprentice and challenged him, "What do you think you're doing? I hear that you are imitating my practice, but as a result you are killing animals wherever you go." "But I am only doing what I saw you do," protested the apprentice. The apprentice then explained that he was just doing what he had seen his master do on their last visit. Whenever he went to see an ailing animal, he would smash on that animal with a hammer, but unfortunately he did not get good results. "You fool!" said the veterinarian. "What you saw was a very special case. That horse had swallowed a watermelon, and so I had to break the watermelon by hitting him from the outside. That was not a practice to be repeated in every case."

MORAL: Sankaracarya is accepted by the Vaisnava sampradaya as an incarnation of Lord Siva, and therefore Sankara is exalted. But Sankara's deceptive teachings of the Mayavadi philosophy were intended for a particular time and place and were not intended to be perpetuated as eternal dharma, as is done by his so-called Mayavadi philosophers.

29: WHO IS THE GREATEST PERSON

A simple village man once wanted to serve the greatest person. He approached the mayor of his town and asked to be given some work. While serving the mayor, the village man noticed the mayor giving tax money to a visitor. He asked who the visitor was, and the mayor told him that he was a representative of the governor. "Is the governor greater than you?" "Oh yes, he is greater than me," the mayor said. "Then I want to serve him," said the village man. The appreciated the man's honesty and recommended him to the mayor. The village man served the governor for some time. Then one day a visitor arrived accompanied by some horsemen. The governor welcomed the visitor graciously and treated him with all respect. When he had a chance, the village man asked the governor who the visitor was. "He is the king's viceroy," said the governor. "And who is the king?" the man asked. "He is the ruler of the whole land," said the governor. "He is very great." "Is he greater than you?" the man asked. "Oh yes, I am just his servant." "Then I would like to serve him." The village man was talented and so, to please the king, the governor sent the village man to him. The man served the king for some months, and then one day the king told him to ready the chariot. A great sage had arrived in the kingdom and the king wanted the sage's advice on how to rule. The village man watched as the king approached the saintly person and offered respect. The king then sat and listened to the sage discourse for some time. Then, as the king was preparing to return to his palace, the village man approached the sage and asked if he were the greatest person. The sage said, no, he was only a menial servant. "So please tell me, who is the greatest person?" "To find the greatest person, you must go to the temple of Narayana," the sage told him. Without a moments delay, the man set off walking. It was evening when he arrived, and the temple doors were closed. The man knocked on the door for a long time. Finally a temple priest came and told him to go home and return the next day. Not having any place to go, the man lay down by the gate and went to sleep. Before sunrise, some brahmanas from a nearby village passed the temple and saw the man sleeping. They noticed that covering the man's body was one of the Deity's chadars. "He is a thief!" they said. In anger they woke the man and asked them where he got the chadar. The man was mystified and told them he did not know where the chadar had come from. The brahmanas then tried to open the temple door and discovered it was locked. They then realized that Lord Narayana Himself had placed the chadar over his servant to keep him warm while he slept. The brahmanas asked the man where he came from, and he told them his story. The man was then accepted into the temple and trained to serve the Deity. In this way the man came to serve the greatest person.

MORAL: We should understand what we are doing in this Krsna consciousness movement, and that this is the culmination of all work and endeavour, devotional service to Lord Krsna.

30: THE AXE AND THE TREE

Mayavadi gurus have ruined the whole world with their philosophy, but there was another Bengali who would destroy them. An axe was once talking to a tree, "I will cut you down," said the axe. "No, you cannot do that," said the tree. "But I am very sharp," the axe answered. "You cannot do anything unless I first give you one of my branches for a handle," the tree said. MORAL: Even though the devotees are very intelligent, they cannot cut down the Bengalis. He said that only if another Bengali helped them could they defeat the rascal Bengalis.

31: THE POOR BRAHMIN

There is a story to illustrate how Vedic education satisfies. Three hundred years ago, there lived a very staunch but very poor brahmana in Krsnanagar near Mayapur. The king, Raja Krsnacandra, heard of the learned brahmana, and he went to visit him. "Brahmana" the king said, "can I help you in any way?" "No, I don't require any help from you," the brahmana answered. "But I can see you are so poverty-stricken," the king said. "No," said the brahmana, "I am not poverty-stricken. My students beg some rice, which my rice boils, and here is a tamarind tree, so I take some leaves and boil them. I am not poverty-stricken."

MORAL: One who knows Brahman is satisfied, brahma bhuta prasannatma.

32: HARDWAR BASTHA

Long, long ago a student appeared for his big examination. One of the questions was about the reign of Hardwar Bastha. The student did not remember anything about this person, but to pass his time, he began to manufacture words. "Hardwar Bastha was a dobendi lactilized by the plactony of tinda." In this way the student filled up the whole paper. The examiner saw that the boy had simply manufactured words, but understanding that this required a little intelligence, he gave the boy a passing mark. MORAL: In a similar way, many books are published that are manufactured only out of nonsense, but because it takes a little intelligence to juggle words, those books are considered valuable.

33: THE MAN WHO WANTED TO TASTE SUGARCANE

A man once told his friend that sugar-cane tastes nice and sweet when you chew it up. The friend did not know what sugar-cane was, and so he asked the man. He was told that it was "just like a bamboo log." The foolish friend then began to chew different kinds of bamboo sticks, but he could never taste the sweetness.

MORAL: Similarly, materialists are trying to find happiness and pleasure by enjoying the material body, but they find no real happiness or pleasure.

34: THE LIBERAL AUNT

A boy was raised by his aunt, who treated him very liberally. Through bad association, the boy became a thief, yet the aunt encouraged him, "Oh, it is a very good business. You are bringing so many things without much labour." In time the boy became a murderer. He was captured and sentenced to be hanged. When asked what was his last wish, the man said he wished to speak to his aunt. The aunt was crying and crying. When she leaned forward to hear what her nephew wanted her to heat, the man bit off her ear. He then rebuked his aunt, saying that if she had chastised him instead of showing him kind affection, he would not be hanged and she would not be lamenting.

MORAL: Acts of charity should be performed in knowledge, not in ignorance.

35: THE MAN WHO WOULDN'T CHANGE HIS WORD

Once there was a professional witness who worked in the court system. This witness would be repeatedly called in for various testimonies, and for this he would receive a fee. When being sworn in, the witness would always swear that his age was sixty years. One day the judge pointed out that for years the man had been claiming to be sixty years old. The witness replied that a man should not change his word of honour.

36: MONEY ATTRACTS MONEY

There was once a man who heard that "money attracts money." This man went to a bank to a place where a clerk was counting money. The man took his own money and threw it on top of a pile of cash. He then stood there motionless, watching the money for a long time. Finally, the clerk asked him, "Sir, what are you doing?" "I have heard that money attracts money, so I have thrown my money on the pile, and now I am waiting for the whole cash to me." "Yes it is a fact," said the clerk, "that money attracts money. Now my money has attracted your money."

37: THE DEAF MAN

A deaf man used to call his wife. She would reply, "I am coming," but the deaf man could not hear her. He used to think, "This woman is deaf." In actuality, he was deaf, but he accused her of being deaf.

MORAL: This is similar to the mass of people who are brainwashed by material illusion and yet who accuse the Krsna conscious persons of being brainwashed.

38: THE SNAKE AND THE MOUSE

A snake and a mouse were once caught in a basket. The snake said to the mouse, "Look, I could eat you very easily, but it's more important for me to get out of this basket. Why don't you make a hole so that we can both escape?" The mouse agreed and started working. But as soon as the hole was big enough, the snake ate the mouse and came out of the basket. MORAL: This is just like the impersonalists who use the guru in order to come to a level of spiritual undestanding, but then reject him or try to become better than him.

39: THE SAINTLY PERSON'S BLESSINGS

Once when a saintly person was passing on his way, he met a prince, the son of a king, and he blessed him, saying, "Raja-putra ciram jiva: You are a king's son, a prince. May you live forever." Eventually the sage met a brahmacari devotee, and he blessed him, saying, "Muni-putra ma jiva: My dear devotee, you may die immediately." The sage next met a saintly person and said to him, "jiva va maro va: You may either live or die." Finally the sage met a hunter, and he blessed him, saying, "Ma jiva ma mara: Neither live nor die."

MORAL: Those who are very sensual and are engaged in sense gratification do not wish to die. Generally a prince has enough money to enjoy his senses, therefore the great sage said that he should live forever, for as long as he lived he could enjoy life, but after death he would go to hell. Since the brahmacari devotee led a life of severe austerities and penances in order to be promoted backe to Godhead, the sage said that he should die immediately so he would not have to keep laboring hard but could instead go back to Godhead. Since the hunter leads a very ghastly life due to killing animals, and since he will go to hell when he dies, he is advised to neither live nor die. And a saintly person may either live or die, because during life hhe is serving the Lord, and after death he also serves the Lord. Thus this life and the next are the same for the saintly devotee, for in both he serves the Lord. Raja-putra ciram jiva muni-putra ma jiva / jiva ma maro va ma jiva ma mara.

40: THE MONKEY KING AND THE OGRE

In a lake there once lived a horrible ogre. His face was black, his belly blue, and his hands and feet were red. He had great tusks for teeth. Whenever any animal came to drink water, the ogre suddenly came out of the lake, seized him, and drew him down by force.

Once a troop of monkeys came to the lake, led by their king. The monkeys were all thirsty. But the monkey king, who was very observant, noted that the footprints of various animals led to the lake but none led away from it. He was suspicious and worried. He gave strict orders that no one was to drink water from the lake until he gave the word. So the monkeys now waited by the waters of the lake, impatient, thirsty. Their discipline was good, however, and the monkey king's orders were scrupulously followed.

Hours passed. Everything was still and hushed. It was a tussle of wills between the monkey king and the unknown monster whose existence the former had assumed. It was the ogre who gave way first. Unable to restrain his greed, he popped up from the center of the lake and said in a stentorian voice, "Why do you not drink? I am the guardian of these waters. I tell you that the water is pure, refreshing, cool, and sweet. Drink, my friends, drink."

"No, my good fellow," replied the king, "your wished will not be fulfilled in the way that you want."

"What do you mean?" queried the ogre.

"You won't be able to catch us. We will drink the water of the lake and yet not fall into your clutches."

"How will you do that?" bellowed the ogre, amused in spite of himself at the monkey king's audacity.

"You will see," replied the monkey king. The monkeys then plucked reeds from the marshes and drank the water through the reeds. Thus was the ogre frustrated.

MORAL: The material energy may look very attractive, but actually it is full of suffering. However, some people need to get kicked by maya to gain realization of the hellish nature of the material energy. But a truly intelligent person takes advantage of the revealed scriptures, which enable him to get realization of the suffering in the material world without having to undergo that suffering himself, just as the monkeys used the reeds to drink the water so that the ogre could not catch them.

41: THE CRIPPLED MAN AND THE PROSTITUTE

Once upon a time, there lived a crippled man. This man was married, but he was attracted to the prostitute that lived in the house opposite. One day his wife saw him looking very morose. "What's wrong, my dear husband?" she inquired. "Even though I am married to you," he replied, "I am attracted to the prostitute. I am asking you to make an arrangement for me." So being a very chaste and obedient wife, she wished to fulfil her husband's desire, and she began going to the prostitute's house when no-one was home, and clean there. After a while this prostitute noticed, "Someone is cleaning my house. I am not asking anyone to do this, so I wonder who it could be?" So one day the prostitute stayed back, and after some time the crippled man's wife came and began cleaning. The prostitute approached her and said, "Why are you doing this?" She replied, "My husband is very attracted to you, and he wants to meet with you, but we are very poor, and cannot afford to pay. So instead I am offering some service. The prostitute said, "Very well, send him over tonight." That night the prostitute prepared a sumptuous feast of rice, dal, sabji etc, and she served a portion of each of these preparations onto two plates, one gold and one silver. When the man arrived, she requested him to partake of the food she had prepared him. "Please take from the silver plate.," she told him. After he had finished all the food on the silver plate, the prostitute told him to take from the gold plate. When he had finished, the prostitute inquired from the man, "Now, did you taste the difference?" Surprised, the man replied, "What difference? These are exactly the same preparations, only served on different plates. You must be crazy!" "No, you are the crazy one!" the prostitute returned. "You are thinking that there is more enjoyment in my body than there is in your wife's body, but actually the ingredients are the same. Only the covering is different."

42: THE MAYAVADI WHO GOT TRODDEN ON

Once, at the hermitage of a venerated guru, a disciple became enlightened after years of penance and instruction at his master's feet. "O master," he said, "I realize what you have been saying all along: God and I are one. Only by the power of illusion have I been making a distinction between myself and God. By your kindness I amawakened. I am inunion wiht the formless, limitless and ineffable supreme." When the guru indicated that the disciple had understood rightly, the disciple asked his master's blessing to go alone on a pilgrimage. On his way, he walked down the middle of the streets, pondering the implications of his recent enlightenment. After some time, he heard an elephant drivershouting from atop his elephant, "Make way for the elephant! Move out of the road!" He saw pedestrians fearfully scurrying out of the elephant's path. "If I am God," our hero reasoned, "Why should I move out of the road for an elephant? That would betray my convictions. The elephant should stand aside for me." Before long, he and the elephant came face to face. "Make way for the elephant," the mahout shrieked in panic, but the ascetic stood his ground. The elephant then grabbed him around the waist, and tossed him out of the way. The ascetic sustained a broken arm and some ugly bruises. Early the next day he hobbled inot his spiritual master's presence, where he related the incident. "O master," he cried at the conclusion, "just yesterday I thought I'd completely understood your teachings, but look what happened when I applied them. How could such a misfortune happen to me, and on the very day when I realized your instructions?" With a slight hint of annoyance, the benign master chided, "Did you not hear God on top of the elephant telling you to move out of the way?" MORAL: This story demonstrates one of the severe flaws in the philosophy of monism, which states that there is absolute oneness - without differentiation - of all beings, including God. As the story shows, if everyone is elevated to the status of God, only calamity can result from the confusion as to who should have the right of way when a conflict of interest arises.

43: THE HUNTER AND THE FOX

Once there was a hunter chasing a fox and he caught it was just about to kill it when he saw the king approaching. As fox hunting was illegal, he put the fox inside his coat and kept him there. The king greeted him and began to talk to him, asking him how he was. "How are you today?" "Oh, I am very good, your majesty." The king discussed the weather and different topics with the hunter, who remained completely cool the whole time. He never even slightly acted like anything was amiss. And then the king left. As soon as the king was out of sight, the hunter fell into two pieces on the ground, as the fox had eaten him in half. MORAL: We should always reveal our minds and never keep problems to ourselves, masking them over, otherwise we will have difficulty in Krsna consciousness.

44: THE WOMAN AND THE BASKET OF BRICKS

Once there was a woman carrying a basket of bricks on her head, working on a building site. She was walking along but then the basket fell from her head. She began crying uncontrollably and loudly chanting Visnu's name. So earnestly did she call out to the Lord He thought, "I had better go," and he appeared on the scene. "What do you want," the Lord asked the woman. "Please put the basket back on my head," replied the woman. "But I can give you liberation! I can give you your own planet, and all you want is for me to put this basket on your head?" The woman replied, "Yes, just put the basket back on my head so I can continue my service."

MORAL: Help is there, but we don't take advantage. Or, people are approaching Krsna for the wrong things.

45: THE OLD MAN, THE YOUNG BOY AND THE DONKEY

Once there was an old man and a young boy who were travelling with a donkey. The young man was leading the donkey and the old man was riding on the donkey. When they passed through a small village, some of the townspeople yelled abuse, "Look at this old man taking advantage of this poor young boy! What a rascal!" After they had passed through the village, the old man said, "We had better swap over, otherwise they will abuse us in the next village." So then they swapped with the old man leading and the young boy riding. But in the next village also they got criticized, "Look at this selfish boy, taking advantage of his grandfather. He should let the old man ride on the donkey." So then they both got off and led the donkey, but in the next village the people yelled out, "Look at these two stupid people! They have a donkey, but they are choosing to walk instead!" Then the old man concluded, "Actually, it doesn't matter what you do, people will always be critical."

46: THE BRAHMIN AND THE COBBLER

Narada Muni was once asked by a brahmana, "Oh, are you going to meet the Lord? Will you please ask Him when I'm going to get my salvation?" "All right," Narada agreed. "I shall ask Him." As Narada proceeded, he met a cobbler who was sitting under a tree mending shoes, and the cobbler similarly asked Narada, "Oh, are you going to see God? Will you please inquire of Him when my salvation will come?" When Narada went to the Vaikuntha planets, he fulfilled their request and asked Narayana about the salvation of the brahmana and the cobbler. Narayana replied, "After leaving this body, the cobbler shall come here to Me." "What about the brahmana?" Narada asked. "He will have to remain there for a number of births. I do not know when he is coming." Narada Muni was astonished, and he finally said, "I cannot understand the mystery of this." "That you will see," Narayana said. "When they ask you what I am doing in My abode, tell them that I am threading the eye of a needle with an elephant." When Narada Muni returned to earth and approached the brahmana, the brahmana said, "Oh, you have sen the Lord? What was he doing?" "He was threading an elephant through the eye of a needle," Narada answered. "I don't believe such nonsense," the brahmana replied. Narada could immediately understand that the man had no faith and that he was simply a reader of books. Narada then left and went on to the cobbler, who asked him, "Oh, you have seen the Lord? Tell me, what was he doing?" "He was threading an elephant through the eye of a needle," Narada replied. The cobbler began to weep. "Oh, my Lord is so wonderful, He con do anything." "Do you really believe that the Lord can push an elephant through the eye of a needle?" Narada asked. "Why not?" the cobbler said. "Of course I believe it." "How is that?" Narada asked. "You can see that I am sitting under this banyan tree." the cobbler answered, "and you can see that so many fruits are falling daily, and in each seed there is a banyan tree like this one. If within a small seed there can be a big tree like this, it is difficult to accept that the Lord is pushing an elephant through the eye of a needle?"

MORAL: param gato 'pi vedanam sarva-sastrartha-vedy api \ yo na sarvesvare bhaktas tam vidyat purusadhamam. "Even though one may have gone to the other side of all the Vedas, and even though one is well versed in all the revealed scriptures, if one is not a devotee of the Supreme Lord, he must be considered the lowest of mankind." (Garuda Purana).

47: THE TWO HOLY MEN AND THE WOMAN

There is a story of two sadhus who were walking on a road. They came to a chest-deep river which had no bridge. As they were about to wade through, a pregnant woman came up and asked, "Sadhuji, please carry me across to the other side." So the sadhu looked at the other sadhu who said, "Oh! Don't do it. We are sadhus, what do we have to do with women?" The sadhu said, "That's right, but this poor lady is pregnant." "Pregnant or not, it is no business of ours. So then the other sadhu said, "Anyway, I will help her." "Well if you want to fall into maya then don't let me stop you."

So the sadhu carried her across the river on his shoulders. They crossed the river, and when they were over he put her down and they went their seperate ways. For about 2 miles they walked without talking. Then the other sadhu said, "It was very bad that you carried that lady across the Ganges on your shoulder. Very bad." The sadhu said, "I only carried her across the river, but you are still carrying her. Why don't you drop her? It is 2 miles already. I forgot her when I put her down, but all this time in your mind it's just been, "Lady, lady, lady."

48: THE LOGICAL BULL

One logician went to purchase some flour from a miller. The miller asked him to kindly wait for a few moments, because he was just grinding it. The logician noticed that the miller kept an ox for turning the millstone; that ox would walk in a circle, the yoke being attached to the stone, and thus the grains would be ground up. The ox had a nice bell tied around its neck also, which clanged as he walked. The miller was in the meantime in his house, doing other things. After a few moments he returned, gathered some fresh-ground flour into a sack, and gave it to the logician. "I have one question for you", said the logician. "A question for me?" returned the miller incredulously. "I am simply a farmer. What do I know of your scholarly questions?" "No, this is a question about your line of work. Tell me, why are you wasting money to keep that bell on the neck of the ox?" "Oh, that way I can do other things. When he walks, I hear the bell. If I hear no bell, I come out and give him a whack to start him walking again. Otherwise I'd be standing here all day just looking after this ox." "But what if the ox stands still and just shakes his head so the bell rings? How would you know if he was working or not?" "Oh, that's no problem, because that animal is not a logician like you." MORAL: Too much intelligence is dangerous sometimes, because it is used for thinking, "how can I avoid labour?"

49: THE DANCE

There was a dance arranged, and three people came and sat down, a sannyasi, a king, and a brahmana. So then the dance was going on and the organiser of the program came and asked the king, "How do you like it?" The king said, "It is wonderful, so satisfying. What an artistic performance." So then he went to the brahmana and asked, "What do you think of this?" "Oh this is Brahman. The Brahman is now thinking, 'I am this particular artist, so in that conception he is able to organize all the different capacities of the body, and he is moving the hand this way and that way. Actually I see Brahman." So then he went to the sannyasi and asked, "What do you see here?" "Oh actually I see a skeleton. It's just bones, and the air is moving it that way. I don't see anything else."

MORAL: There are different ways of seeing things according to one's realization.

50: THE BRAHMIN WHO KNEW MANY LANGUAGES

There was one learned brahmana who knew so many languages. He came to a king's court and he spoke in so many languages that no-one could find out what was his language. He said, "If you can find out my language, then you are very clever." The king was so confused. "What is his language?" But the king had a joker in his court whose name was Tenalilam. He was from Tenali, a village in Andha Pradesa, and he was a very crooked cunning fellow. He said to the king, "Don't worry. Tonight I will find out what his language is." So the king said, "If you find that out I will give you a thousand gold coins." The joker said, "All right, I will find out." So then in the evening the pandita was walking in the garden. The joker had covered himself with a big blanket, and he sat on a tree. When the pandita walked below, the joker jumped on him. The pandita got a big fright. "Oh my God!" he exclaimed in the Keralan language. Thus his real language was revealed. MORAL: Philosophers may be speaking so much high philosophy, but then if they get emotional or angry, sometimes their real motive comes out.

51: THE FISHERMAN AND HIS BASKET

In previous times the grhastas were habituated to asking if anyone was hungry. And so one grhasta went outside and called out to see if anyone was hungry. He saw a fisherman and he said, "Have you taken your meal?" And the fisherman said "No," so he took him inside. Then he said, "Please leave the basket outside. It is too smelly." After he fed him he asked the fisherman, "Do you have a place to sleep tonight?" He said, "No." He allowed him to sleep there. About one or two o'clock in the morning the grhasta had to get up to answer nature's call and when he looked to see how the guest was doing, he found him tossing and turning. He asked, "How are you sleeping?" The fisherman replied, "My sleep is very disturbed. I cannot get to sleep!" "Why is this? What is the difficulty?" And the fisherman said, "The difficulty is that I cannot sleep without my basket. I am used to the smell. Without smelling that fishy smell, I cannot go to sleep." So then he said, "Alright, bring your basket, and you can go to sleep." Then the fisherman slept soundly.

MORAL: In the same way, everyone in the west has to have a machine. To brush your teeth, you need a machine. So people have become addicted.

52: THE FROGS IN THE BUCKET

Once two frogs had fallen into a milk pot, and were drowning. After struggling to keep afloat for some time, one frog gave up hope and drowned. The other frog, however, was more determined and he kicked and kicked, despite the hopeless situation. But due to all this kicking in milk, a hard lump of butter was formed and by standing on this, the frog was able to jump out of the bucket. MORAL: Be determined for Krsna.

53: THE BOY WHO WOULD NOT GIVE UP SWEETS

A woman brought her child to see a saintly person and said, "The doctor has told me that my child is a diabetic and must stop eating sugar and sweets, but in spite of what I tell him, he won't stop. Since you are a saintly person, I am sure that if you tell him to stop eating sugar and sweets he will listen and his life can be saved. Surprisingly, the saintly person replied that he could not tell that to the child was brought back the next day he would see what he could do. Disappointed and confused, the mother took the child away and returned the next day. Upon seeing that they had returned, the saintly person looked sternly at the young boy and said, "Stop eating sweets!" The boy was so startled that from that day he never again ate sweets and sugar. When the curious mother inquired from the sadhu why he had not told that to the child the day before, the sadhu replied, "Because yesterday I was still eating sugar."

MORAL: Example is better than precept. A leader cannot tell the public to stop smoking if he himself smokes. He should practice himself first, and then he becomes acarya.

54: GOVINDA BHOG!

This story is called Phuraphai govindaya namah. Phuraphai means "puffed rice." Once there was a man who was carrying grains, puffed rice, on his head. He encountered a big gust of wind that carried away all of his grains, and then the man exclaimed, "Govinda Bhog!" (An offering unto Govinda). Because the grains had been taken away by God, he considered it as his share of devotional service that he had given something to him.

55: THE HUNTER AND THE BIRDS

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